Page 110 - Three Truths - Trillion Doubts - Volume -II

truly repentent. Other days it feels I am attempting to feel repentent. After prayer, a cosy feeling of warmth in His thought is felt which is very relaxing.
That is all the play of ego. Prayer is the toughest spiritual discipline to cultivate so far as I know. May you be in a state of prayer always and may that happen soon.
6. Out of 30 days in a month, I sincerely follow the Commandment only 10 days. The rest 20 days I fall asleep even while I am doing Point A. During such times I just pray and have a feeling that I am not able to follow the Commandment. Most of the days I sleep by 9:30 PM, so I am not sure what to do.
Early to bed and early rise is a good habit. After 9 P.M. you can sit in prayer for sometime and slip into sleep. The Prayer is a state of mind and not a ritual and we should slowly move into the condition of being prayer all the time. May you be blessed with such condition soon.
7. Most of the events during the day were recollected seeking pardon for lapses & mistakes committed knowingly or unknowingly. Then offered prayer to Master to take me to my Goal of having complete oneness with HIM.
We are asked to repent and seek forgiveness in the prayer. Read the Tenth commandment well. What has this to do with seeking oneness with Him? Sincere submission to the Master will make Him understand what we need and he will act accordingly. Moksha is not had for asking or praying. One has to work hard towards that.
8. Regular in placing all lapses before the Master seeking his pardon. Care is taken not to repeat them . But still at times one or two get repeated and at that time feel very unhappy. I earnestly feel to become free from all impurities and pray Master for it.
Our task is to pray and the rest is His will.
9. Some days I get into prayerful mood and feel repentent for the current state. Some days this state seems to be far off. This is an aspect of sadhana that needs to be greatly improved.